Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
It was confusing and full of hummus
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
