You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
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