His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize