No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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