How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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