D3 body, D1 cock
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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