Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
