Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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