I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize