This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize