U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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