there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
