so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
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he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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