After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
When are your genitals available?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
