i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize