I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
