my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
