Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Randomize