what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
