Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
