don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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