btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
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You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
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I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
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