TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
