the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
