you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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