Dude my mom stole all your condoms
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize