he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize