Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
