You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
