would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever