you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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