You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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