so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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