I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Randomize
