either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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