if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize