At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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