like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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