so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
