Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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