I accidentally had phone sex last night
Please, let me fuck your mom
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize