If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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