I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
