does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize