My room smells like vodka and shame
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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