a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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