Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
