Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
