the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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