His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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