her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
we're making bets on your personal life
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
