She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
