Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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