He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
