She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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